Minneapolis Greetings

I arrived in Minneapolis, where I will stay until this evening when my colleagues arrive and we drive to Rochester. The airport is wonderful, very easy to navigate and with a great light rail system that goes downtown or to the Mall of America with lots of stops in between for only $1.50. I'll be heading to the Mall of America where I will have lunch with a friend today and wait out the day.

I found it interesting that the first thing with which Minneapolis greets visitors is the cemetery. Not necessarily very comforting to know that they feel the need to keep the cemetery so close to the airport!

Guy on a Plane

This week I'm in Rochester, Minnesota again. On today's flight to Minneapolis from DC, which was quite full, I was sitting in the window seat. The man sitting in the middle seat next to me pulled out his laptop, which was so big that it encroached quite a bit into my personal space once he opened it and started working on it. It was quite easy to see what he was doing on it and quite hard to avert my eyes considering how it was practically right in front of me.

He was writing a to-do list. The first item on the list?

Search for a bride. Find her by Dec. 2008.

After that:

Obtain perfect health
Minimum talking
Prepare a perfect press kit.

Overall, I was impressed! That's quite an ambitious to-do list!

Starbucks and Politics

My local Starbucks has some cute young lady baristas who will be able to vote this year for the first time. They know me pretty well by now so today they engaged me in conversation as for whom I was going to vote. One of them told me she was a feminist but that she was uncomfortable voting for a woman for president. When I asked why, she said, "What if she gets bad PMS and then decides to bomb a country?"

I had to inform her that Hillary Clinton is 61 years old and way past menopause by now, so I was pretty sure she was NOT going to get PMS!

"Oh, good point," she said!

Besides, with that excuse, how can women ever advance any further? This from a self-professed feminist, no less!

Just so we're clear, though, this is a question of being young, not being less intelligent. This young lady strikes me as very smart, just learning still!

Skool is Gud

It drives me crazy when I see misspellings on public signs. How hard is it to open a dictionary? When I was filling up my tank at a local Exxon, I saw this message (play the video). A misspelling and a typo? Sheesh! In case you can't see it because of the scrolling, if you're hungrey you can go into the snank shop. Okey-dokey!

Self-Confidence

At my local Starbucks, there is a small chalkboard where the barista is able to write his or her drink recommendation for the day. I liked what Brian had to write - that shows self-confidence!

Pet Peeve #821: Voice Mail Systems

Here's one that gets me. I have a voice mail system at the office and a separate one on my cell phone. I also have an answering machine at home that I can check remotely by pressing keys on a phone, just like voice mail. Of course, I also travel a lot and stay in a lot of hotels, and the phones in my room have their own voice mail systems...

AND THEY ALL USE DIFFERENT CODES!

On some systems, I have to press 3 to erase a message, but on other systems 3 means save the current message and move to the next one! On some I use 8 to erase a message but on others 8 means to call the person who left the message! Do you think I can keep all these systems straight? The simple answer: NO. I always end up erasing messages I want to keep and calling people I don't want to talk to at the moment.

On my office phone, I have to press 2 to hear new messages. Where's the sense in that? Most others use 1 for that. But if I hit 1 on my office phone it means start a fire in a random part of the building...I think. I don't know; I'm afraid to hit that one.

So here's my question: why on Earth can't sadistic voice mail system inventors standardize on one set of codes? Make it simple! Oh, wait, it's because they are SADISTIC!

Strange Situation #351 - Elevators

I was with a friend a couple of weeks ago. We were walking down a hall toward an elevator. I told him, "You know what's weird? It seems more often than I would expect I press an elevator button to call an elevator and the elevator door instantly opens. No big deal, right? But then, someone walks out! I always find that disconcerting, as if the elevator had been sitting at that level for a long time and the person inside was trapped until I saved him. But the person never looks grateful or upset, so I have to believe that I happened to hit the button just at the moment when the elevator arrived!" My friend said that was weird and that that has never happened to him.

He then pressed the button to call the elevator. The doors instantly opened...and someone walked out. Not looking grateful or scared at all. But my friend looked a little surprised!

Italian Lynchings

(click the strip to enlarge and read it)
Most people are surprised to learn that the worst mass lynching in American history was of innocent Italians in New Orleans in 1891. In fact, they were acquitted by a court of law but subsequently lynched by a vigilante mob.

From Wikipedia: After a wave of increased immigration to the US in the late 19th century, Italian-Americans also became lynching targets, chiefly in the South. On March 14, 1891, eleven Italian-Americans were lynched in New Orleans after a jury acquitted them in the murder of a New Orleans police chief ^[16] David Hennessy. The eleven were falsely accused of being associated with the Mafia. This incident was the largest mass lynching in U.S. history.

Follow Up: See http://www.i-italy.org/1348/pane-amaro-bitter-world-italian-americans

Cute Card

I gave this to my son for his birthday. I thought this was the cutest card! He laughed out loud when he read it, the first time I think he has ever done that with a card I've given him. :-)

Me on You Tube

The Boston chapter of ASTD (American Society for Training and Development) has asked me if I would be willing to come speak there later this spring. I said I would and they asked if I could post a YouTube video of myself speaking so that their committee could get a sense of my speaking style. I consented, so I posted the first YouTube of myself last night. If you'd like to see it, click here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJ8H2Ins3Xw

Cell Phone....Back from the Dead

It's hard to believe but I tried my cell phone again last night and ever since then it seems to be OK! I guess I fished it out of the water quickly enough (while cursing) and the cell phone has a tight enough seal that the water didn't make it into the innards before I salvaged it. Yea!!!

My Luck Really Sucks Sometimes

This past Tuesday evening I was in Nashville airport, getting ready to board my plane, and speaking on my cell phone to a friend. Suddenly my cell phone decided to give up the ghost. With its dying breath, it displayed three deep bands of color on the screen and a message that disappeared quickly: Image not found. That didn't sound good at all. No matter how many times I reset the phone, pulled out the battery (which still had a good charge on it), the phone would no longer come back to life. When I got home, I left the battery out all night and then tried it again Wednesday morning: same results. That was it - I needed my phone. I get a lot of client calls on it. I took it to the Sprint store, the one where I always end up waiting an hour in line. When it was finally my turn, I put the battery in, turned it around so that the tech could see it, and turned it on. The shock on his face at seeing nothing but three bands of color....never happened. The phone was working! It was really I who was in shock, but no matter, the phone was working. I told him about what had happened and he told me that if it happened again to come back.

So everything was fine until the phone acted a little strange and I reset it Friday morning. Oops - nothing but pretty colors again. I took my wife to lunch and then we headed to the Sprint store, where after an hour's wait in line, I showed the tech the problem. He told me that they would need to take the phone in the back and get it checked out to see if there was any water damage in the phone. If there was, that would void the warranty. I told him I was sure there wasn't and he told me to come back in an hour. When I went back and waited in line again, they told me the phone had no water damage and they gave me a brand new phone.

Jump to today. I went to the grocery store to pick up some dog food. When I got home, I gave my dog his food and then filled up his water bowl. When I placed it on the floor, my cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket...smack into the middle of the water bowl. No matter where you live in the world, you probably heard a distant liturgy of curses that would make a sailor blush. Water damage? Yah, you betcha, two days after I got the new phone! I knew what I had to do - take the battery out immediately and let it sit for a couple of days to dry out. And that's still no guarantee. The water managed to seal the battery cover well enough that it took me about 3 minutes to get it off. Who knows now if it's going to work again. I suspect not. And this time I'll be liable for the cost of a new phone. My phone costs $550 new. Just shoot me now and take me out of my misery, please.

The Day I Might Have Been Fired

When I was 19 years old, I worked at a small town Holiday Inn as night auditor and desk clerk. This was before computerized reservation systems and other technologies. I was the only one on duty all night.We had actual metal door keys and paper files.

Anyway, one night at about 3 a.m., a tired-looking guy walked in and asked for a room. I signed him in and gave him a room key. As mos people did, he walked back outside to drive his car around to the side door which was closer to his room.

After a minute or two it suddenly hit me: I had given him the key to a room that already had a guest in it! OH NO! I ran down the hallway toward the room to stop him. The hallway had a couple of 90 degree turns in it. Just as I turned the last turn, where I was now about 100 feet down from where the room was, I saw the guest insert his key into the room lock and turn it. Just as I was opening my mouth to stop him, I saw a man wearing only his underwear run out of the room screaming at the intruder, who quickly made a hasty exit out the side door through which he had come in.

I just knew that one or both guests would come to the front desk now and have me fired for my terrible mistake. I ventured back to the desk to take my lumps and gather my belongings so that I could make a clean exit when my boss came in four hours later. Then I waited...and waited...waited. Neither guest came to the desk. So I waited some more...were they playing with my mind? I waited...and nothing ever happened. Neither guest ever complained. The new guest never came back and I kept my job until I quit a few months later. Sometimes things do work out. Read my next blog entry for when things do NOT work out.

A Dog's Life

My dog is getting old. It wasn't that long ago that he was a six-week old pup and we were taking him home. Of course, that was 11 years ago. However, in 11 years he has become an old man...uhm...dog.

My dog still shows bursts of energy sometimes but for the most part he likes to sit and lie down a lot more now. He finds it harder to jump onto our bed...joints, you know...and so let's us pick him up now. In the past, he didn't like to be picked up; he liked to feel his four paws were firmly on the ground. Now he doesn't seem to mind because he finds his paws aren't able to leave the ground of their own volition as easily.

Things that used to excite him, for example, "Do you want to go in the car?", now generate an iffy response. Sometimes yes, sometimes no. He sometimes seems a little confused, though he is as loving and affectionate as he has always been. He is still very happy to see me when I come home, still sad to see me leave, still likes to celebrate with me when there's a reason to celebrate.

My dog is getting old, yes, but I hope he still has years to go before his tail stops wagging altogether. However, even now it can be said that no dog has been so loved, no dog has received as much attention, no dog has been loved as well and has in turn filled everyone he has met with so much happiness and joy. My dog is my friend, the best friend I've ever had, and I hope he and I will enjoy more years to come. I wish he could live as long as I but I know that's selfish of me. He has had a good life thus far and when he's ready to go, he'll have led a good life. I can only hope I can say the same about me.

Tennessee House Representative and Me

Here I am being flanked by Tennessee House Representative Dolores R. Gresham and her assistant in the old chambers of the State Capitol. They made me feel very special!

Damage in the Tennessee State Capitol

Look carefully and you can see the pockmarks in the main staircase hand rails, created by bullets that came whizzing past the heads of rivals in the Tennessee State Capitol back in the 1800s!

They have never been repaired. I guess they represent history.

More Stacy Videos

Here you go!

Very Cool Stunt in New York City!

Take a look...

http://www.maniacworld.com/frozen-in-grand-central-station.html

Nashville!!!!

I'm in Nashville for two days doing consulting work at a government agency - a real nice, smart group of people! It's a pleasure to work with them.

Another pleasure I had last night: the weather was beautiful so I decided to walk around for a while to wake up and get a little exercise. Several years ago, I had spoken at a conference on the outskirts of Nashville and a couple of times in the evening we had come into town to go to Printer's Alley, where there are a lot of great blues and other music clubs. We had a great time back then listening to a great blues guy called Stacy Mitchhart.

As I walked around, lo and behold, I found out that my hotel is only 2 blocks from Printer's Alley! I then discovered that Stacy was playing last night at BB King's Blues Club. I was psyched and decided that's where I would have dinner last night. Stacy and his band played three sets, but I was only able to stay for the first set because of work deadlines I had to meet last night, but what a great time I had watching this band in action! Man, they are phenomenal. Catch them if you can! Click on the pics and videos to get a little glimpse for yourselves. MORE VIDEOS COMING AS SOON AS I CAN EDIT THEM DOWN TO UNDER 100Megs, the limit here on Blogger.

More photos on my Flickr page. Click here to see more pics of Nashville and Stacy.

Carnevale Time!

OK, Carnevale, or Mardi Gras (Fat Tuesday), as they call it in New Orleans, is already past but this is the first time we were able to get together to celebrate! It was party time at our house.

See more photos by clicking here.

Engineering Question of the Day

Q.) How much does a house weigh ???
A.) Just a tad more than a rural two-lane bridge can hold, apparently.
So Would This Be Covered By House Insurance, Car Insurance , Or, Does It Come Under Roadside Assistance ???

(Click to enlarge each photo and see it in all its glory.)

Oh, the English language! Tongue Twister

Three witches watch three Swatch watches. Which Witch watches which Swatch Watch?

An Interesting Experience at Costco

Today while I was at Costco, I stopped at one of those carts where someone was giving away free samples. A Costco employee, an elderly woman, was handing out samples of chicken noodle soup. While I was trying it, a middle-aged woman stopped and starting reading the label on the soup can. She exclaimed, "Oh, my, 40% sodium!" (People often misread this as meaning that the soup is 40% sodium by volume, a ridiculous amount. Rather, this refers to a serving of soup representing 40% of one's daily allowance of sodium.)

I agreed with her calmly, "Oh, that is pretty high." (It is.) The lady who had stated her opinion walked away at that point and the elderly Costco employee then turned her attention to me. She was upset and bitter and told me, "If you don't like the soup, just keep moving! Why do you have to stand there and be nasty about it! Just look at you! You obviously have to lose weight! If you can't have sodium, just don't eat it!" I was surprised, to say the least, and stammered something about, "Hey, I didn't say it in the first place, that lady did." and walked away. Never had anyone at a store talked to me that way (that I can recall).

As I continued to shop, this gnawed at me a little. In the past, I might have let this gnaw away at me for days, but this time I decided to take the bull by the horns, but in my own diplomatic way. I returned to the Costco employee and calmly said, "Do you think it's a good idea to insult your customers? Some people might complain to your managers." She was still upset to a degree that I believed was totally unwarranted by my smaller earlier agreement with the high-sodium lady, and started to lay into me again. She again mentioned my high blood pressure, at which point I had to correct her. My blood pressure has always been in the normal range. I don't have a problem with sodium. She mentioned the weight again and I told her about how much heavier I used to be and that generally I do eat healthy.

She then told me, "My husband used to be heavy, and then he got thin, and now he's not interested in me anymore!"

Wow! You could have knocked me over with a feather! I patted her on the back, told her, "I'm sorry" and wished her well, going on my way. Whatever weight she had put on my shoulders was gone. It was obvious now to me what the root of her anger was.

Now you may say she was completely at fault, that I had no need to defend my low blood pressure or otherwise good health, but I have learned over the years that when someone seems to have it in for me (not that it happens often!), it usually has very little to do with me and mostly with something else going on in his or her life. I felt pretty good. Not only had I thwarted a drive-by insulting, but I also countered it with a calm, reasonable short discussion and a sympathetic ear.

Getting Older...Getting Better

One really cool thing about getting older is that I care less now, sometimes not at all, about what other people think of my tastes in music, movies, or anything else. Last week I had a friend and her two kids, a young lady of 16 and a young man of 21, in my car. The mom and daughter were enjoying the music I was playing in my car, Green Day's "American Idiot", and the young man criticized the song as a bunch of whiners. I laughed! Who cares what other people think of the music I like? As my friend Doug, a true audiophile if I ever met one, told me once, "Music is a personal thing. Nobody can tell you not to like music you like."

I'm only 47 and peer pressure is no longer an issue. I guess when I'm 80, I'll be one of those cranky ones that tell everyone else what to do. When I turn 120, watch out, I'll be impossible to deal with!

Once in a While, My Doggie Surprises Me!

Last night we were getting stuff together for Purple Heart, who came today to pick it all up. They call once a month or so and we usually have something to give them. This time it was clothing, an older TV (still works but no room for it) and other stuff.

Our dog watched us intently. Recently I purchased for him a new dog food bowl. As I took items for Purple Heart outside to the stoop, suddenly he ran inside, grabbed his old bowl, and brought it outside, throwing it onto the stoop. He has NEVER taken his bowl out. It was exactly as if he was saying, "Here, I don't need this anymore, give it to a poor dog in need!"

I just had to take a picture!

Second Follow Up To Rodari School Visit

I received the latest and greatest school newsletter from the Rodari School in Modena, Italy, that I visited last November (see my blog entries on here and here). It's a whopping 37 pages long and 2 of the pages are all about my visit and my sister! Click on the two images to enlarge and read them...that is, IF you can read Italian! Otherwise, just look at the photos. :-)

The Cutest Animals Ever!

No word are necessary here! Just say awwwww...
(Don't forget to click the photos to enlarge them a little.)